Captain Beefheart's 10 Commandments of Guitar Playing

1. Listen to the birds.
That's where all the music comes from. Birds know everything about how it should sound and where that sound should come from. And watch hummingbirds. They fly really fast, but a lot of times they aren't going anywhere.

2. Your guitar is not really a guitar Your guitar is a divining rod.
Use it to find spirits in the other world and bring them over. A guitar is also a fishing rod. If you're good, you'll land a big one.

3. Practice in front of a bush
Wait until the moon is out, then go outside, eat a multi-grained bread and play your guitar to a bush. If the bush dosen't shake, eat another piece of bread.

4. Walk with the devil
Old Delta blues players referred to guitar amplifiers as the "devil box." And they were right. You have to be an equal opportunity employer in terms of who you're bringing over from the other side. Electricity attracts devils and demons. Other instruments attract other spirits. An acoustic guitar attracts Casper. A mandolin attracts Wendy. But an electric guitar attracts Beelzebub.

5. If you're guilty of thinking, you're out
If your brain is part of the process, you're missing it. You should play like a drowning man, struggling to reach shore. If you can trap that feeling, then you have something that is fur bearing.

6. Never point your guitar at anyone
Your instrument has more clout than lightning. Just hit a big chord then run outside to hear it. But make sure you are not standing in an open field.

7. Always carry a church key
That's your key-man clause. Like One String Sam. He's one. He was a Detroit street musician who played in the fifties on a homemade instrument. His song "I Need a Hundred Dollars" is warm pie. Another key to the church is Hubert Sumlin, Howlin' Wolf's guitar player. He just stands there like the Statue of Liberty-making you want to look up her dress the whole time to see how he's doing it.

8. Don't wipe the sweat off your instrument
You need that stink on there. Then you have to get that stink onto your music.

9. Keep your guitar in a dark place
When you're not playing your guitar, cover it and keep it in a dark place. If you don't play your guitar for more than a day, be sure you put a saucer of water in with it.

10. You gotta have a hood for your engine
Keep that hat on. A hat is a pressure cooker. If you have a roof on your house, the hot air can't escape. Even a lima bean has to have a piece of wet paper around it to make it grow.

the importance of sound...

Recently I've been thinking about the importance of sound. Not just music, mind you, but the very sensation of sound. It's all vibration, after all.

I started thinking about this when I went to Italy.
I got the chance to do sound for a play in Milan last year. The play had been rehearsing for weeks and was more or less up on its feet. Then I got to rehearsals and when I added the simplest sounds to play, it changed the attitude of the whole cast. They were acting differently, they were more invested in their characters. It really made me think about how important sound is.
They asked me to write some music for the opening of the play, some of the transitions, and themes for some of the characters. This really changed the whole vibe of the play. After that I started thinking about my favorite films and how crucial a role the sound and music play in them.
It actually renewed my respect and admiration for sound. It made me listen to sounds differently; with newer, fresher ears. It reminded me that despite the thousands of different sounds we hear every day (including sounds that we unconsciously block out and aren't even aware of) sound is nothing to ever be complacent about. I don't believe in magic, but for me, sound comes pretty damn close.

ZINES

When I was in Portland, I noticed a lot of zines.
You see, zines are what people used to call blogs.
They were way more interactive, way more creative.
There's something about the tactile sensation of holding something as opposed to staring at a screen, too.
That's why I think there's going to be a backlash from mp3s and all the other digital media.
People are going to want to hold a record cover. They're going to want the sensation of putting a cassette into a deck...some colorful, 12" x 12" artwork. Some real analog sound and visuals, too. Mark my words!

Anyway, gotta go and do a little research about getting a new external hard drive...